Cod Philosophy

It’s easy to appear smart by casually mentioning people like Schopenhauer and Kierkegaard.

It’s easy to quote a great thinker to make one seem smarter than one is. Emerson said ‘the next thing to saying a good thing yourself, is to quote one’.

It’s easy to appear philosophical by making ambiguous comments. Often, the more there is on display, the less there is to see.

Cod philosophy is reflection that passes as insightful but is actually devoid of any real depth.

I get lost in Paris. The city exists, it is mapped, it is not new. But it is new to me. I am exploring where people have been before. I am cod exploring.

My exploration may not have any real depth but it is insightful to me…

Real Things Are Invisible

It was a weird kind of weather.

Not dry but not wet. Muggy.

I didn’t know if I should wear short sleeves or take an umbrella. It didn’t feel right taking both. I took short sleeves.

I wasn’t going anywhere particular. Just out. I was feeling suffocated. It was one of those days.

It started to rain. A light drizzle. I was along the river and sheltered under a bridge. Some ducks swam by.

There was nothing under the bridge. Nothing but time and space and air to think.

Often, the more there was on diplay, the less there was to see.

The rain continued.

I was lucky I hadn’t brought my umbrella.

Notes From The Not So Seine

I was in a café today and there was a parrot in a cage that said, ‘Ça va? Ça va?’
Wow, I thought, a French speaking parrot…
***
I went to watch the finish of the Tour de France the other week.
All of France stops for the Tour.
Near me, an old lady remonstrated with a gendarme.
‘I don’t give a fart about the Tour de France,’ she told him. ‘I want to get across.’
All of France stops whether it wants to or not.
***
I was in a supermarket.
‘Bonjour,’ I made sure I said to the man on checkout. I like the manners of this formal society.
‘Bonsoir,’ he said.
Damn. It had gone after six. I should have checked the time. Stupid formal society.
***
‘I used to think that work was the most important thing in my life,’ she said.
‘Don’t tell me,’ I said, ‘then you fell in love, right?’
‘Yes.’ She smiled.
‘It’s a bit cliché isn’t it?’ I said.
She frowned at me.
My circle of friends in Paris is not expanding as fast as I thought it would…
***
I went to see Sartre the other day.
I had some questions for him.
I stood there and looked down at him.
He didn’t say anything, of course.
They were stupid questions anyway.

Report On The Construction Of Situations

I was listening to an interesting discussion on the radio the other day.
It was about how Paris was one of the most visited cities in the world but, although this brings in a lot of money, it stops the city from developing as no-one wants to change anything that might deter tourists from visiting. It becomes a city in aspic.
And the danger here is that real life drains away. The spectacle takes over.
This is true of many major urban tourist destinations. They become just a mass of shops and restaurants catering to tourists. And for many of the latter, the point of the visit is now to show that one has been to the city rather than the being there itself. There is no real engagement with the surroundings. A quick photograph next to the Eiffel Tower or Big Ben or the Statue of Liberty and seen it, been there, done that…
Baudrillard said that we are now living in a society of re-production and not production.
I agree. And I do it myself. Especially when it comes to re-producing other people's ideas...

The Doors Of Perception

‘Bonjour Seb.’
‘Bonjour Seb.’
‘Ça va?’
‘Ça va. Plume de ma tante.’
‘How’s life is Paris?’
‘Well, I’ve been thinking…’
‘Oh, sacre bleu, do you never stop?’
‘… that if the actions, values and attitudes I consider normal in England are different in France then what makes them normal?’
‘Quoi?’
‘Who determines the way of life that is considered normal? I mean, why do a majority adopt certain attitudes and habits especially when many of these are absurd?’
‘The attitudes and habits are from the culture…’
‘Are they? Why do something simply because someone else is doing it? That sounds abnormal to me…’
‘Have you been up the Eiffel Tower yet?’

Je Ne Sais Quoi

'Why do you speak French?' she asked.
'Why?'
'What’s the point? It’s not a useful language.'
We were in France. She was French. We were talking in French.
I didn't know what to answer in any language.

Farewell Leicester Square

Johnson said, 'When a man is tired of London, he is tired of life.'
I said, 'I'm just tired of life in London.'
And as Balzac's Rastignac said, 'A nous deux, maintenant!'